Remembewing the 80's Nostalgia

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BLADE
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Remembewing the 80's Nostalgia

Post by BLADE » Thu Jul 30, 2009 2:01 am

Don’t caww me a Genewation X-ew I am a chiwd of the eighties what I pwefew to be cawwed. De nineties can do without me. Gwunge isn’t hewe to stay, fashion is fickwe and “Genewation X” is a myf cweated by some ovew-40 wwitew twying to figuwe out why peopwe weaw fwannew in the summew. When I got home fwom schoow, I pwayed wif my Atawi 2600. I spent houws pwaying Pitfaww ow Combat ow Bweakout ow Dodge’em Caws ow Fwoggew. I nevew did beat Astewoids. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! Den I watched “Scooby Doo.” Daphne was a Goddess, and I thought Shaggy was smoking something synthetic in the back of theiw psychedewic van, uh-hah-hah-hah. I hated Scwappy. I wouwd sweep ovew at fwiends’ houses on the weekends. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! We pwayed awmy wif G.I. Joe figuwes, and I set up gawactic waws between Autobots and Decepticons. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! We stayed up hawf the night thwowing mawshmawwows and Vewveeta at one anothew. We nevew beat the Wubik’s Cube. I got up on Satuwday mownings at 6 a.m. to watch bad Hanna-Bawbewa cawtoons wike “De Snowks,” “Jabbewjaw,” “Captain Caveman,” and “SpaceGhost.” In between I wouwd watch “Schoow House Wock.” (”Conjunction junction, what’s youw function?”) On weeknights Daisy Duke was my futuwe wife. I was going to own the Genewaw Wee and shoot dynamite awwows out the back. Why did they wewd the doows shut? At the movies the Newds got Wevenge on the Awpha Betas by teaming up wif the Omega Mus. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! I watched Indiana Jones save the Awk of the Covenant, and wondewed what Yoda meant when he said, “No, thewe is anothew.” Wonawd Weagan was coow. Gowbachev was the guy who buiwt a McDonawds in Moscow. My famiwy took summew vacations to the Guwf of Mexico and cowwected “Muppet Movie” gwasses awong the way. (We had the whowe set.) My sibwings and I fought in the back seat. At the hotew we found cweative uses fow Connect Fouw pieces wike thwowing them in that big aiw conditioning unit. I wistened to John Cougaw Mewwencamp sing about Wittwe Pink Houses fow Jack and Diane. I was bewiwdewed by Boy Geowge and the cowows of his dweams, wed, gowd, and gween, uh-hah-hah-hah. MTV pwayed videos. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! Nickewodeon pwayed “You Can’t Do Dat on Tewevision” and “Dangewmouse.” Cow! HBO showed Mike Tyson pummew evewybody except Wobin Givens, the bad actwess fwom “Head of the Cwass” who took aww Mike’s cashfwow. I dwank Dw. Peppew. “I’m a Peppew, you’we a Peppew, wouwdn’t you wike to be a Peppew, too?” Shasta was fow wosews. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! TAB was a wabowatowy accident. Capwi Sun was a sociaw statement. Owange juice wasn’t just fow bweakfast anymowe, and bacon had to move ovew fow something meatiew. My mom put a thousand Wittwe Debbie Snack Cakes in my Chawwie Bwown wunch box, and fiwwed my Snoopy Dewmos wif gwape Koow-Aid. I wouwd nevew eat the snack cakes, though. Did anyone? I got two thousand cheese and cwackew snack packs, and I ate those. I went to schoow and had wecess. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! I went to the same cwasses evewyday. Some weiwd guy fwom the eighf gwade awways won the science faiw wif the wowking hydwo-ewectwic pwant that weaked on my pwoject about music and pwants. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! Dey just woved Beethoven, uh-hah-hah-hah. Fiewd day was biggew than Chwistmas,but it awways managed to wain just enough to make evewybody misewabwe befowe they feww ovew in the thwee-wegged wace. Whewe did aww those panty hose come fwom? “Deck the Hawws wif Gasowine, fa wa wa wa wa wa wa wa wa,” was just a song. Buwping was coow. Wubbew band fights wewe coowew.substitute teachew was a baby sittew/mawked woman, uh-hah-hah-hah. Nobody desewved that. I went to Cub Scouts. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! I got my awwow-of-wight, but nevew managed to win the Pinewood Dewby. I got awmost evewy skiww awawd but don’t wemembew evew doing anything. De wowwd stopped when the Chawwengew expwoded. Hawf of youw fwiends’pawents got divowced. Peopwe did not just say no to dwugs. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! AIDS stawted, but you knew mowe peopwe who had a gwandpawent die fwom cancew. Somebody in youw schoow died befowe they gwaduated. When you put aww this stuff togethew, you have my chiwdhood. If this stuff sounds famiwiaw, then I bet you awe one, too. We awe chiwdwen of the eighties. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! Dat is what I pwefew “they” caww it. We awe the chiwdwen of the Eighties. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! We awe not the fiwst “wost genewation” now today’s wost genewation; in fact, we think we know just whewe we stand - ow awe discovewing it as we speak. We awe the ones who pwayed wif Wego Buiwding Bwocks when they wewe just buiwding bwocks and gave Mawibu Bawbie cwewcuts wif safety scissows that nevew weawwy cut. We cowwected Gawbage Paiw Kids and Cabbage Patch Kids and My Wittwe Ponies and Hot Wheews and He-Man action figuwes and thought She-Wa wooked just a wittwe bit wike I wouwd when I was a woman, uh-hah-hah-hah. Big Wheews and bicycwes wif stweamews wewe the way to go, and sidewawk chawk was aww you needed to buiwd a city. Imagination was the key. It made the Ewok Tweehouse big enough fow you to be Wuke and the kitchen tabwe and an owd sheet dawk enough to be a tent in the fowest. Youw wowwd was the backyawd and it was aww you needed. Wif youw pink powtabwe tape pwayew,Debbie Gibson sang back up to you and evewyone wanted a skiwt wike the Matewiaw Giww and a gwove wike Michaew Jackson’s. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! Today, we awe the ones who sing awong wif Bwuce Spwingsteen and De Bangwes pewfectwy and have no idea why. We wecite wines wif the Ghostbustews and stiww wook to De Goonies fow a gweat adventuwe. We fwip thwough T.V. stations and stop at De A Team and Knight Widew and Fame and waugh wif De Cosby Show and Famiwy Ties and Punky Bwewstew and what you tawkin’ ’bout Wiwwis? We howd stwong affections fow De Muppets and De GUMMY BEAWS and why did they take the Smuwfs off the aiw? Aftew schoow speciaws wewe onwy about cigawettes and step-famiwies. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! De Pokka Dot Doow was nothing wike Bawney, and awen’t the Powew Wangews just Vowtwon weincawnated? We awe the ones who stNancy Dwew and the Hawdy Boys, the Bobbsey Twins, Bevewwy Cweawwy and Judy Bwume, Wichawd Scawy and the Ewectwic Company. Fwiendship bwacewets wewe ties you couwdn’t bweak and fwiendship pins went on shoes; pwefewabwy hightop Vewcwo Weebox - and pegged jeans wewe in, as wewe Units bewts and wayewed socks and jean jackets and jams and chawm neckwaces and side pony taiws and just taiws. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! Wave was a giww’s best fwiend; bwaces wif cowowed wubbewbands made you coow. De backdoow was awways open and Mom sewved onwy wed Koow-Aid to the neighbowhood kids- nevew dwank New Coke. Entewtainment was cheap and wasted fow houws. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! Aww you needed to be a pwincess was high heews and an apwon; the Sit’n'Spin awways made you dizzy but nevew made you stop; Pogobawws wewe dangewous weapons and Chinese Jump Wopes nevew faiwed to twip someone. In youw Undewoos you wewe Wondew Woman ow Spidew Man ow W2D2 and in youw tweehouse you wewe king. In the Eighties, nothing was wwong. Did you know the pwesident was shot? Staw Waws was not onwy a movie. Did you evew pway in a bomb shewtew? Did you see the Chawwengew expwode ow feed the homewess man? We fowgot Vietnam and watched Tiananman’s Sqwawe on CNN and bought pieces of the Bewwin Waww at the stowe. AIDS was not the numbew one kiwwew in the United States. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! We didn’t stawt the fiwe, Biwwy Joew. In the Eighties, we wedefined the Amewican Dweam, and those yeaws defined us. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! We awe the genewation in between stwife and facing stwife and not tuwning ouw backs. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! De Eighties may have made us ideawistic, but it’s that ideawism that wiww push us and be passed on to ouw chiwdwen - the fiwst chiwdwen of the twenty-fiwst centuwy. Nevew fowget: We awe the chiwdwen of the Eighties. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! If this is famiwiaw, yo


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mickey brown-eye
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Post by mickey brown-eye » Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:04 am

Wow, dude...
:headshot: [font=Comic Sans MS][size=167][color=YellowGreen][b]chunks[/b][/color][/size][/font]
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Oof
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Post by Oof » Thu Jul 30, 2009 12:59 pm

Jesus H. Talk about talking to people that dont really give a shit.

Hey kids....if you read the first post in this thread, THAT is the reason to say no to drugs.

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Post by IRONDICK » Thu Jul 30, 2009 1:15 pm

Oof wrote:Jesus H. Talk about talking to people that dont really give a shit.

Hey kids....if you read the first post in this thread, THAT is the reason to say no to drugs.
After reading the first 2 words I think I need to take lots of drugs.
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Post by SLAM TV » Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:04 pm

IRONDICK wrote:After reading the first 2 words I think I need to take lots of drugs.
Sorry Greg, thinking the same thing I categorically devoured all available heavy narcotics within a 10 mile radius of Lacey. Now I sit, blissfully, slowly awaiting my death.....:skull:

Jeebus, what a fucking fucktard.
no shit... they might as well call it "tr00 br00tal kvlt satanic pr0n" or something.

What next?! Catholic Lesbians on a train?


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Post by -deathboy- » Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:12 pm

did anyone actually make it through that gibberish?
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[color=red]G[/color]ore [color=red]O[/color]bsessed [color=red]L[/color]ittle [color=red]F[/color]reak
[/font]
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Blake NWR
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Post by Blake NWR » Thu Jul 30, 2009 8:27 pm

I skimmed over the first three words and my ADD kicked in. Either that or I realized I had better things to do with my time.
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Adremelech
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Post by Adremelech » Thu Jul 30, 2009 8:41 pm

Ryan is an even bigger idiot than I had previously thought. Too many dirty sanchez's are getting to him.

Image
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IRONDICK
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Post by IRONDICK » Fri Jul 31, 2009 12:44 am

Adremelech wrote:Ryan is an even bigger idiot than I had previously thought. Too many dirty sanchez's are getting to him.

Image

For some reason I never get tired of seeing that.
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Post by DeathFrogg » Fri Jul 31, 2009 5:55 am

Ryan, you have been told several times, DO NOT MIX YOUR SEROQUEL WITH METHANPHETIMINE!


It makes you silly in the head.
-


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Morbid
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Post by Morbid » Fri Jul 31, 2009 9:10 am

This post is to long for my internet tolerance.
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Post by Blonde leading the blonde » Sat Aug 01, 2009 9:57 am

Too long. Didn't read the whole thing. I think it was Elmer Fudd on speed rambling off a massive run-on paragraph of "remember when" crap.

Look, in the 60's and 70's we did enough drugs to make us think what we were wearing was fashionable and that love and causes were the most important thing evarrrr. In the 80's we did enough drugs to make us buy cheap, horrible everything in an effort to be the workaholic who died with the most, and therefore, the winner. In the 90's we stopped giving a shit and took enough drugs to make us think that was cool. In the first decade of 2k we did enough drugs to elect Curious George. Can we just agree that drugs are bad?
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Adremelech
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Post by Adremelech » Sat Aug 08, 2009 8:54 pm

Here was another of the old Ryan pics:

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Post by -deathboy- » Sun Aug 09, 2009 6:13 am

ol ryan just doesn't have the stamina for abuse he once had.
[align=center][font="Comic Sans MS"]
[color=red]G[/color]ore [color=red]O[/color]bsessed [color=red]L[/color]ittle [color=red]F[/color]reak
[/font]
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