Friday the what the... that's IT?

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Remo D
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Friday the what the... that's IT?

Post by Remo D » Sun Feb 15, 2009 3:12 pm

I'm not buying it, even though I DID buy a ticket (only had to pay for one because one showed up for free in the HIS NAME IS JASON documentary DVD sleeve (wife's Valentine present, as was my escorting her to this screening). But I simply can't believe that what we just sat through was really the uber-hyped "reimagining, reboot, don't call it a remake" from the guy who had done similar honors for THE TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE.

Okay, I'll be straight up with you and you can throw me out of your party if you want to. Jason NEVER scared me. But I still SAW all of the FRIDAY THE 13TH films... even if I wasn't a hardcore horror fan, Siskel and Ebert had made SUCH a cause celebre out of them. They ranged from interesting to awful, and I never felt the need to collect them on video, but they were always fun to talk about. Thing is, I went on to MARRY an ultimate Jason fan, and one of the very first things I did for her come Valentine's day was present her with the complete collection... enough info? You know where I fit in now. And our fondest shared F13 memory was a chat with the delightful Betsy Palmer.

Well, Betsy isn't in the new one--not even in a cameo. You probably know that the "Mrs. Voorhees" story is blown through before the credits even finish rolling, and that they do a quick "Jason in the burlap sack mask" segment before finally getting to the hockey mask and the would-be-Part-3 meat of the story. I must admit they DO get it right (though none of the characters save Jason himself are based on any previously appearing F13 icons). Mrs. Voorhees still avenges Jason's death. Except Jason isn't dead and now he's avenging his mother's death. And it used to be about camp counselors. But soon enough it's just about killing anyone and everything around. Characters are one-dimensional (each gets their "moment" where they try to prove that they're not: especially the black character who gets offended when he's asked if he's an aspiring rapper and then smiles and admits that he's exactly that, ha ha). And Jason starts killing them. Except for the one he's got chained up in his secret cellar (well, that's different, but perhaps a reason WHY he does that might have helped? and don't say "because she looked like his mom" unless you want me to believe that he had a habit of keeping his MOTHER chained up in the basement... she thought he was DEAD, remember?) so Jared Padalecki can comb the area looking for her.

Hey--it's not great art. I KNOW that the stories and characters are always paper-thin. I KNOW that movies like this exist to supply the sex and the splatter (usually in that order). And there ARE one or two attention-getting kills (especially in the beginning) and one or two false scares that actually work. But none of that changes the fact that this transfigurative, genre-infusing, $44 million smashapalooza is one huge, overhyped, overrated BORE.

I know--that's just ME talking, and I was never a huge F13 fan to begin with, so why should you expect anything different from me? I anticipated that. Let's ask my wife instead, shall we?

"It was boring. I can't believe it, but this one really sucked."

What she said.
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Post by mickey brown-eye » Sun Feb 15, 2009 4:34 pm

I thought this movie made Jason X look like a masterpiece. Noy only was it boring it didn't make much since either.
For example, Jason carrying a headless body and a back pack that belongs to the captured girls brother and not for a second does the chick think that the corpse was her brother.
and how about the end where the characters feel the need to take (they didn't drive to the wood chippers I guess they dragged Jason back)the best piece of evidence (Jason) of a mass killing and dump him in the lake.
Did 12 year olds write this crap?
To top it all off the previews all sucked too (with exception of the watchmen)
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Post by Darth Tanner » Sun Feb 15, 2009 5:49 pm

I'm not sure how I felt about this one after seeing it. I grew up watching the original films and they are part of what made me a horror fan. One of my favorite childhood memories was seeing JASON LIVES at the drive-in during its original run on a double-bill with A NEW BEGINNING. I enjoyed all of them to some degree. Even if the movies are not particularly great, they still retain a certain 80's charm and I enjoy watching them periodically to relive those moments of my youth. I had mixed feelings when I heard about this remake. To me it seemed pointless to remake a film that has spawned ten sequels (not to mention an unrelated TV series). On the other hand, I enjoyed Platinum Dunes' remake of TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE so I was hoping for the same magic here. Besides (as Rob Zombie demonstrated with his HALLOWEEN redux) nothing is remake-proof these days.

All I can really say is that I didn't hate it, but I didn't exactly love it either. They could have done more development with the story instead of just rehashing the first four movies. The new Jason moved a little too fast for me and he just didn't have the presence of the other Jason actors that we know and love. There were also some glaring plot-holes that were never fully explained. For a movie that was nearly 90 minutes, I wouldn't have minded 10 or 15 more just to fill in the story gaps. None of these movies are known for having strong stories, but for a "reimagining" they could have at least done something different. I did enjoy the gratuitous nudity and some pretty effective kills, but it wasn't enough to make this a classic even by exploitation standards. I have no regrets about seeing it and I would definitely see it again just for the sleaze factor. But I'll take the original movies in my collection over this "reimagining" anyday. I still enjoyed the remake of MY BLOODY VALENTINE a lot more than this.

The best thing about the movie were the trailers at the beginning. Out of them, the ones for WATCHMEN and the remake of LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT excited me the most and I'm looking forward to them. I also caught the trailer for Quentin Tarantino's INGLORIOUS BASTARDS and can't wait for that one as well. There was also one for something called OBSESSED which brought back memories of SWIMFAN. It looks like trash, but I have a soft spot for Ali Larter so I'll likely end up seeing it:)

On the subject of Platinum Dunes, I hear they are also behind the upcoming remake of NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET. I just hope they don't drop the ball on that one. Oh well, if they do it will only make people appreciate the original even more.

Remo - good call on that HIS NAME WAS JASON doc. That disc can't be recommended enough. If your wife is a huge fan, she is certain to enjoy it. Althought I have to admit that the "re-enactment" scenes with Tom Savini were a little on the cheesy side. Still there's some really good stuff in there.
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Post by mickey brown-eye » Sun Feb 15, 2009 8:26 pm

Darth Tanner wrote:



The best thing about the movie were the trailers at the beginning. Out of them, the ones for WATCHMEN and the remake of LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT excited me the most and I'm looking forward to them. I also caught the trailer for Quentin Tarantino's INGLORIOUS BASTARDS and can't wait for that one as well. There was also one for something called OBSESSED which brought back memories of SWIMFAN. It looks like trash, but I have a soft spot for Ali Larter so I'll likely end up seeing it:)

You scored on the previews. All I got were some crappy Seth Rogen stoner comedy, witch mountain with The Rock and the Watchmen (great use of that song by Muse in the watchmen trailer BTW)
I actually went to see the full length Transformers 2 trailer that was supposed to be playing with Friday the 13th, but I guess they didn't send that reel to Bellingham...
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Post by mickey brown-eye » Sun Feb 15, 2009 8:31 pm

Darth Tanner wrote: The new Jason moved a little too fast for me and he just didn't have the presence of the other Jason actors that we know and love.
I actually liked the speedy Jason. I thought that was cool. I blame the lack of presence on the shitty filmakers, rather than the actor. (Sorry, I thought the Texas remake blew ass also.
With the exception of transformers if it says Michael Bay on it, it is pretty much guaranteed to suck IMO :p)
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Post by mickey brown-eye » Sun Feb 15, 2009 8:36 pm

I don't fucking believe it. Friday the 13th is a spin off of Transformers!!?
Travis Van Winkle who played Megan Fox's anal jock douche bag boyfriend Trent in transformers played an anal jock douche bag named Trent in Friday also... okay I maybe stretching on that one a bit
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Post by Darth Tanner » Sun Feb 15, 2009 9:02 pm

mickey brown-eye wrote:You scored on the previews. All I got were some crappy Seth Rogen stoner comedy, witch mountain with The Rock and the Watchmen (great use of that song by Muse in the watchmen trailer BTW)
I actually went to see the full length Transformers 2 trailer that was supposed to be playing with Friday the 13th, but I guess they didn't send that reel to Bellingham...

Shit...I forgot all about the TRANSFORMERS 2 trailer (shame on me!). That was awesome and I'm also looking forward to that one as well as the G.I. JOE movie.

As for the "fast" Jason, sorry but for some reason it just didn't work for me. I know he ran some in Parts 2 and 3, but in this one he reminded me too much of the running zombies in the DAWN OF THE DEAD remake. I do have to agree with you though about the said "douchebag" mentioned in your other post. The audience I saw this with couldn't wait to see him bite it. Too bad his death scene came up being a bit short IMO.
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Post by Latte Thunder » Mon Feb 16, 2009 6:52 am

I actually REALLY liked the new Friday. I didn't buy the hype, I went in with what I thought were reasonable expectations: horny, stoned teenagers will be hacked to pieces by a cunning, nigh-unstoppable killer in a mask and I wound up getting it in the end. I've always regarded these movies like seeing a circus. A series of acrobatic kills tied together by the loosest plot.

I guess I just have a tolerance for that sort of thing.
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Post by mickey brown-eye » Mon Feb 16, 2009 7:11 am

Darth Tanner wrote: I do have to agree with you though about the said "douchebag" mentioned in your other post. The audience I saw this with couldn't wait to see him bite it. Too bad his death scene came up being a bit short IMO.
That is funny. The first thing my buddy said was "I can wait to see that guy die" :metal:
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Post by Irrylath » Mon Feb 16, 2009 9:59 am

Darth Tanner wrote:On the subject of Platinum Dunes, I hear they are also behind the upcoming remake of NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET. I just hope they don't drop the ball on that one. Oh well, if they do it will only make people appreciate the original even more.
seriously?!? :eek: I dunno, those are classics in my book. I can't fathom a remake...though, I'll probably go see it. Oi.
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Post by Latte Thunder » Mon Feb 16, 2009 10:22 am

The Nightmare remake moving ahead now. They even have a director but I'm at a loss to recall their name. After the weekend take for Friday, they're probably fast-tracking Nightmare to cash in even harder.
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Post by Griff [Mola] » Fri Feb 20, 2009 6:46 am

I just can't believe they spent almost 20 mill on a FRIDAY THE 13TH movie... Who's playing Jason? Marlon Brando?

Thems some major above-the-line costs.

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Post by Darth Tanner » Mon Mar 02, 2009 9:17 pm

HA! Well it looks like this "remake" might me making an exit from the multiplexes before too long. After being the #1 movie on its opening weekend, it got its ass kicked last weekend by MADEA GOES TO JAIL and fell all the way to #6. Now its not even on the top ten! Funny thing is that the only noteworthy release this weekend was the Jonas Brothers movie (which was #2) and the other eight films in the top ten are older releases (ie. TAKEN, CORALINE, SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE, etc.). Although horror films that make it to the top don't stay there for very long, I thought it was interesting that this one took a huge nosedive in just one week and continues to plummet. Still it made a ton of money in relation to its budget and is apparently a success in the eyes of the studio since they are already talking about a sequel. Also, the aforementioned remake of ELM STREET is slated to start shooting in just a few months!

I'm still going to give this another chance when it comes out on DVD (which will probably be just a matter of months given the current box office trend). I might warm up to it a little more the second time. As I said before, I enjoyed the sleaze factor more than anything else but for some reason I couldn't get into this "remake" as I did with the classic Jason films.
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