Children Of The Living Dead, BAD,REAL Bad

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Children Of The Living Dead, BAD,REAL Bad

Post by ROBERT »

I can't believe I've spent 90 minutes of my life with this turd. Has anyone else seen it? I'd like to review it, but It would be such a waste of bandwidth. It starts off with a bunch of rednecks,Tom Savini among them, mowing down a bunch of zombies in a field. Tom and Sheriff deputy investigate a farmhouse and find a group of children being held hostage by murderer Abbot Hays. There's an obligatory confrontation. We race ahead 14 years, where the now zombified Hays, causes the deaths of the now teenage children, and proceeds to bring them back to life. A zombie rampage ensues. ZZZZZZZZ! Not even a good one.

If this sounds even remotely interesting or decent, guess again. Another lame ass cash grab by Producer Russo.
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Post by Griff [Mola] »

I think Russo ultimately had little to do with this, the project was taken out of his hands, for better or for worse.

I may have mentioned it before but Savini was considering going around to all the video stores and placing stickers that said something akin to "This movie is shit." on all the copies of CotLD.
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Post by I am 138 »

Russo makes utter shit anyway. Scream Queen's Naked Christmas? What the fuck is that? And I just read one of his crappy books, so now I really hate him. 15 minutes of new footage for NOTLD, indeed. You suck, Russo!

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Post by Latte Thunder »

I have yet to read a decent word about this movie. I haven't seen it, didn't really plan on it but I have to ask myself "could it be so bad that it's entertaining?"
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Post by DylanDog »

"but I have to ask myself "could it be so bad that it's entertaining?"


Answer-no.

By the way, has anyone here seen his flick Midnight? I borrowed it from the video store a few weeks back and have been putting off watching it. Should I even bother?



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Post by ROBERT »

Dylan I fell asleep during Midnight. That's my ringing endorsement. Latte, don't even waste you're time. They're are other BAD entertaining movies. Children wasn't even half decent as a good bad film.

[This message has been edited by ROBERT (edited 11-09-2001).]
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Post by DylanDog »

I didn't even give it a chance to put me to sleep. I think I shut it off about 30 minutes in. It was very obviously not worth my time. In fact, this is one of those movies that I not only didn't like, it actually made me angry.

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Post by Griff [Mola] »

I actually have a soft-spot for MIDNIGHT. Its good for a laugh, the woeful theme song and Lawrence Teirney's unforgettable performance as a drunken kid-fondling slob who turns out to be a not-so-bad guy afterall.

Doesn't mean you'd like it, though.



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Post by ROBERT »

I think I already know this one,but why did it make you angry?
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Post by DylanDog »

It's really hard to say. I think it reminded me too much of Vanilla Ice. I watched it thinking "Goddamn! Not one person realised how bad this sucks and put a stop to it before it made it all the way to my TV?" It felt more like an insult, than a movie.

Most bad movies have something about them that makes you say "well, alright, I'll let it slide". Perhaps it was an honest effort, but poor execution. This movie felt like a total sham from the getgo. Like a baseball player thrown out JOGGING to first base, y'know? The sort of thing that's just not acceptable.

I've just never felt more "cheated" by a movie before, or since.
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Post by ROBERT »

Yeah, I've felt that condescending attitude from a film too. Like the guys, who made it didn't give a shit, and that's smeared all over the frames. Almost like,"Thanks for the money and fuck you".
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Post by howlermonkee »

Well, I read the reviews and I know what I WON'T be watching this weekend Image Good thing I come here on occasion isn't it?

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Post by Griff [Mola] »

Jesus Christ, what a festering pile of fuckshit.

I'm barely into this thing but I'm already feeling like a rape victim that should've known better than to go home with this one.

The start shows some promise - for a highschool project - but things rapidly degenerate from there.

Hey, I know this thing is digital but damn it, does it have to look like it was shot by a drunken redneck? Not too mention there's enough wide angle lense-action to put a dozen Hong Kong films to shame. I'm sure the only thing any focus pullers in the neigbourhood would have been pulling is social security and quite possibly the trigger on a pistol aimed at their cochlear once they'd seen what'd become of their profession. Its an ugly, ugly unnatural look.

The amount of off-screen dialogue and audio bafoonery would make Doris Wishman shit her adult diaper. Many times.

And Savini? His acrobatics are the best thing in this flick and all too brief. I guess its a good thing he got away with his $10,000 fee as soon as he did. At least you know there's no reason to hang around any longer than need be once he exits, none to gracefully.

Pffftt....
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Post by DylanDog »

Yep, and I tried to watch Midnight on your semi-recommendation and I got about 30 minutes into it. Again, a total mess. It was at least funny for a little bit, but my tolerance level for crap is not nearly as high as it once was so I shut it off.

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Post by Griff [Mola] »

You've still got MIDNIGHT? Does that vid store do monthly rentals or something?

Yeah, maybe I should've mentioned that the good times roll with that flick only if you're in the presence of a like(feeble)-minded chum to help you rip the shit out of the movie and have a good laugh at that fat giggling guy's expense. But then you're right, time's running out for all of us and we can't afford to have the same tolerance for crap like we used to.

Now, if I could only get my hands on HEARTSTOPPER...
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Post by DylanDog »

Actually, I got Midnight at a used video store where my friend works so I just take home whatever I feel like watching, and then if I decide I want to keep it, I pay for it. Otherwise, I just go put it back on the shelf. Sweet deal, eh? Image

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Post by ROBERT »

Quote:"But then you're right,time's running out for all of us and we can't afford to have the same tolerance for crap like we used to".

Ironically,I said the same thing to someone, this week. It's so fucking true.
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Post by DayGlowAbortion »

Has Russo made ANYTHING worth it's film stock besides that now moth eaten classic NTOLD? Children is just another in a long line of shit from him. As the man sez, we're getting to old and too tired to put up with this.Unless it's free.
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Post by DylanDog »

But they WERE free for me and I still couldn't deal with it.
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Post by Latte Thunder »

Based on this thread alone I had to fight nigh-irresistable urges to pick this one up and see just how bad a movie could be. I stood there in the movie store debating Children of the Living Dead... or Chopper. I actually had to debate this (I only had one free rental slip). While I stood there looking at them some asshole came along and grabbed the last copy of Chopper in the store. I STILL didn't rent Children.
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Post by DylanDog »

Reminds me of the time I was gonna buy a Czechoslovakian Paul Kariya hockey card. It was behind the counter and I figured I'd just ask for it when I was done rounding up my other purchases. Of course, in the meantime, someone else bought it. It took me a couple years to find another one. Pissed me off.
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Post by Scott »

A message for Russo: Now might be a good time to retire. What a crock of shit this flick is. How the hell did Savini ever get involved with this? Same goes for Bill Hinzman. Not only is the story shit, but this one features perhaps the worst acting I've seen even if Children only had a nickle and dime budget.
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Post by Darth Tanner »

I've walked past this one in the video store a few times and considered renting it just to see how low Russo has sunk. Supposedly, this is supposed to tie in somehow with his atrocious "special edition" of NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD. After giving it some thought, I decided to hold off until they lowered the rental price or else I got the opportunity to see it for free. True $4 is not much, but it is too much to spend on a money-grubbing hack like Russo.
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Post by I am 138 »

What was his "new footage," anyway? I never saw the 30 year edition or whatever that was. Isn't Hinzman the guy who did Flesheater aka...Revenge of the Dead or something like that? THAT was bad, so if he's sunk to new lows....Jesus!

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Post by Latte Thunder »

I haven't actually seen it, but I've read that the new footage is of the old guy in the cemetery who first attacks Barbara. He's being buried or something when he attacks the guys digging the grave. There's another one I know of which is supposed to be of Ben's experience at the Diner when the zombies first attack en masse. I can't bring myself to watch it. Night is one of my all time favorite movies, period. I just can't find it in myself to watch that profanity (heavy on the melodrama!)!! Alegedly the new footage blends right in with the old footage, but I just can't see that happening.
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